Drinking Alcohol taught me how to fly
Then it took away the sky....

Monday, April 30, 2012

SUBVERSIVE

This, for Open Link Night #42
Dverse Poets  Pub
Come HERE after 3 PM Tuesday, 
and leave a piece of yourself.




c.1940-1980

After many 
(forty?)years
of soul-seared
mind-feared
existence...
he at last believed
his ears:

"You are stupid, useless;
You are a lazy, crazy
piece of worthless
non-humanity.
Plain insanity.

Always you dreaming,
forever seeming
ensconced within yourself.
OH! Your vanity.”

c.1980-2012

Gone by now are numerous birthdays.
Whole new nests of friends
arrive to rest their 'ends'
on porch swings, steps, and
handmade wooden chairs at his
damp-coffee-colored kitchen table.

LIFE for them--him--has ripened, to settle...
so like ancient, heavy, dented kettle
sitting contentedly nearby
under its steam—released
cloud, no more loud.
however, they, nor the pot
--anytime near deceased!

You are your worst own enemy.”
Piercing word heard so far ago.
He knew now its meaning,
yet back then, did NOT.

Gathered assemblage discussed that
lives--of which they'd deeply tasted,
Thank God
had not been annulled, deleted.
They decided and reached a conclusion,
that their lives had not gone to pot.
They had no claim
to shame

He reached back 
to discard some memories:

"You are stupid, useless;
You are a lazy, crazy
piece of worthless
non-humanity.
Plain insanity."

He smiled
He lived
and, from the  heart of him
He loved...

--steveroni
May 1, 2012

  IMAGE:  downpour by
sardjito11-d4y943g.jpg
      in DeviantArt

28 comments:

  1. i am glad he could live beyond the words given to him...we can be told such things until we believe them...and live them...i like the analogy of the kettle man...well done steve...

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  2. Words can kill.

    But he has will.

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  3. RAINFIED61:
    Yup! A lifetime later, one says,

    "It still is not your words which I remembered. It is how you/they made me feel."

    BRIAN:
    Imagine! "The kettle calling the Alkie 'black'"--grin!

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  4. words have such a lot of power and can surely keep us prisoners for a while...good to escape and being set free..

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  5. This is one of my favorites of yours. I love the visual you created in the 1980-2012 years. What a wonderful feeling. Triumph, how uplifting yet humbling.

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  6. This is awesome, my friend. Well felt, well written, well done.

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  7. Yeah- get this this totally...sometimes it takes years to break free from those words, sometimes we spend years telling ourselves we are something we are not...only when you learn to love yourself can you really start to live...nice write man (stu mcp)

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  8. Oh, that we had ears to hear the voices of love around us and not just the words that hurt from one or two or a handful. Why do words that hurt hold sway over those that heal? Loved the perspective and wisdom and hope sewn here.

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  9. this was like a parable... if only people could know the power of their words.
    i like the journey through the years, the wisdom that comes with having survived

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  10. I like the woodcut!
    -'plain insanity' is where
    pickling took me!
    Pikesville doesn't happen to be Kentucky- long ago I got into
    beau coup trouble with white
    lightning and dry counties- :)

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  11. Peace and wisdom finally quells inner trash talk. Kill the message and obliviate the bearer - what counts is counting the present as it flows. Lovely philosophical message, Steve.

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  12. this resonates in me. a profound write about the power of words. and adore that concluding lines are filled with light and hope.

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  13. oh ... very many people, it goes like this ...
    yesterday .... ... today .... tomorrow ...
    it only stops when it has been recognized: He loves me!

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  14. I like the flashback and wisdom Steve...there are some hateful things that stick in our mind but hopefully we are able to overcome and live life fully ~

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  15. Words haunt us...hard to get over it sometimes but so good when we break free. Well done!

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  16. CLAUDIA!
    Only we can experience freedom, after being set free. And it is what we do with that freedom which either guarantees its continuance, or renunciation into slavery of our minds—and hearts

    MAGPIE!
    Ya know, I did not realize it, but it's one of my favorites also. Thank you for letting me 'see' that.

    PATTIKEN!
    Thank you, my friend! Breakfast yesterday at First Watch. Missed you!

    POEMS OF HATE AND HOPE (STU)
    Man, YOU really understand. Yes, years and then more years to begin real life!

    CINDEE SNIDER RE!
    Seems as if every Peep who comments here has a clear understanding of what I tried to say. Thank you for your visit.
    PEACE!

    MRS MEDIOCRITY
    Fortunately I answer you “Yes!” Those day are in the past. They do not haunt me. My main goal in relating my own stories is that someone, somewhere, somehow, might be helped...if God wills it.
    Glad to meet you here!

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  17. IZZY!
    I believe Pikesville is in Virginia. During my drinking career, as a bartender for a number of years, I took with me every night (3 AM) a Pint of 190-proof , 95% ALCOHOL (that was its name!). It got me the five miles to home. It was bottled in a canning jar! I wonder sometimes HOW we are still alive! But you and I KNOW already WHY—to help God help others! What a NEAT job we are given, and it keeps us sober. Can it get any better?

    BEACHANNY!
    Your message: Live in the moment—NOW!--as it flows. Excellent words! (From an excellent writer!) Thank you!

    MOONLITPOETIC!
    Yes, all is well which ends well (concluding lines explain that.) For that good ending is required willingness, acceptance and a change in attitude concerning ALL things. But I think you know that—grin!

    COSIMA!
    Even though we meet here not very often, it is always a pleasant surprise. And I love to see your smiling face, and read your comments of wisdom and truth!
    Love and PEACE, Cosima!

    HEAVEN!
    Yup, friend...I use those hateful memories to tell my stories, so that another out there somewhere, may not feel TOO much alone—if they are suffering having lived through the same shit.

    AYALA!
    Thank you for coming here and commenting. Among the factors in healing, I believe time is one.
    PEACE!

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  18. Many never reach the other side where they can let go of all that baggage and learn to love themselves again. We're lucky.

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  19. Very powerful message. Glad you were able to overcome the harsh words. Emotional wounds are often more long lasting and more difficult to heal than physical ones.

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  20. Words are so so powerful, Steve E. I hope He tells himself daily how AWESOME he is. Because he IS!!

    And I'd love to see those hand-made wooden chairs!

    xoo

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  21. steve, this is one of your strongest poems in my estimation...Goes straight to the heart and the fact of the matter.

    Yes, words can kill. And we share a lot of that, neh?

    Powerful, beautiful and transcending poem, Steve.

    Love and Peace,

    Jane

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  22. LAURIE KOLP!
    We lucky yes. We chosen (maybe?) to carry a message that there is hope, nothing is so broken it cannot be fixed—or patched—grin!
    We are WE
    We are not ME!
    BLESS YOU, Peep!

    LOLAMOUSE!
    When my head began clearing I laughed at the thought that emotional scars were long-term in many cases. I thought that was “girly” stuff—emotions. HA! “Long lasting and difficult to heal” you wrote. You wrote RIGHT!
    PEACE!

    JANNIE!
    You so sweet, girl. Words are made powerful by thoughts they conjure. And the meaning is somewhere IN those words. And yes, I agree, God has allowed some 'awesomeness' into this guy's life. And he is grateful to God, and God's messengers—the Peeps—for the new life, AND the old chairs!

    LADY NYO!
    Funny thing! Jane, we are who we are, and since I love most everything I'm doing, the puzzle pieces seems to be fit..SOMEtimes!

    I believe the words themselves are ornamental atop that building, which is thought. And thoughts...yes, thought can kill.

    I'm fortunate that Peeps like you read these things, and comment. That spurs a guy to continue, regardless of what he thinks of the quality. Also fortunate to have YOU as a blog-friend!
    Later.
    Another time, another posting, and life continues to be productive...and FUN!

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  23. well written and thoughts provoking indeed.

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  24. TARIQ MIAN
    Thank you Mr Pakistan-Man for your kind remark.

    I have been reading about your country, and share many of your views, even though it is NOT my business.

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  25. I love this one! I love it! I love it! I love it! and did I mention I love it ? Can you tell this one really spoke to me this morning?

    XO

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  26. Love the kettle steaming, very atmospheric. The two separate stages of his live, a very nice way of comparing/contrasting his priorities and way of life.

    The final trashing of negative thoughts brought a huge grin, because I carried that crap around for years. Circular file for that thinking, man. Loved this! Perfect May Day verse, too. Peace, Amy

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  27. Words can be more painful than jagged steel.

    I am thankful for the happy ending. Oh, but the poem is not over yet, is it. There are more songs to be sung.

    You sing, I'll do the chicken dance. See? It all works out.

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  28. DEAR BELLA!
    'Jagged Steel' words--that's GOOOOD! I'll do the Humpty-Egg Dance--I'll somebody picks me--the pieces!) up at the finish. AND SING! Yes! Whistle?
    Thank you, and PEACE!

    SHARP LITTLE PENCIL!
    Yup, I had to "lose the history" of my wicked ways, or whatever. Clean up MY sidewalk...

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