ANOTHER SUNSET 2

Posted ON and FOR dverse

"Open Link Night" #128

(reposted and edited from OLN week #9)

PHOTO: LAST NIGHT FROM OUR FRONT YARD

pics

of sky--

for this guy,

way

too much.

wish no more

for

to grace

my blog space.

scene

from street

where I greet

a

sober

october.

my
prayer:
ev'ryone

live
for now.

and above

all--
 asking
                     Peace.
                                   Light. 
                                               Love.

--steveroni

ONE in FIFTY-FIVE

--Drawing/Painting by one FAVORITE blogger--Claudia

"From my sketchbook/two women at the neighbor table"

When chest feels empty

due to hurting heart,

public library becomes solace…

turning to prayer

holding book to me tightly,

turn page and read:

Amazing! that E V E R Y T H I N G

affects everything else,

is dependent or depends on...

and I alone–as hermit,

missed the whole meaning of

Ocean Universe

in which all things are….

One         

--by steveroni 

(inspired by Claudia!)

55 words exactly--that what we doing at dVerse today...Join us?

REGULARLY and OFTEN

Self Awareness   (Google Images)

 

A reason for praying, meditating,
regularly and often:

To avoid being dragged
into miseries of Peeps
I meet and greet daily, 

I ask for awareness. 

Regularly. Often.

Higher Power has sent me

some few who are at
bottom of life's barrel.
Or so they believe,
or maybe perceive.

Need to review, renew and
refresh my attitude, my gratitude,
regularly and often...

...I ask for the gift of humility.
That virtue is alien to my nature.
One Peep I know is a 'living futility'
I try to make sure he sees, agrees,
that God works in him...not I,
as he climbs from pit of denial
to that place where he can 

look me in the eye

...and smile!

Another I watched with care
during an eight-month growth--
no psycho-doc, no counselor.
We climbed 12 steps together
(God held him close--tethered!)
from despair to breathe fresh air,
to live, laugh, and love more.
Placed self on
farthest shelf.

And occasionally I feel
not abused...
but so 'used'--
sneak away. In private, kneel.

Gratefully meditate.
Humbly pray.
Regularly.
Often.

Steve E  (aka steveroni)

href, href, href...clearing my throat!

 DEFINITIONS

"Brrrrrrrr" means shiver and shake

"Poppies" means...pretty flowers?--grin!

"Href, href, href" means clearing my throat!

"Tuesday" means it is time to write something--ANYTHING!

So (href, href, href) Last Thursday I was chairing an AA meeting, and while putting a topic on the table, someone from behind shook my shoulders, made me spill coffee, and jarred me a bit.

His Voice behind me, in a whisper:

"I've got a liver--I've got a liver!"

(With a transplanted liver

he'd begin to plan, work, play, live!

The metabolic alcoholic,

(who I 'sponsor' in AA)

with nervous shout, ran out

hitting the floor, and through the door..

At the explanatory announcement,

the group of eighty-five alcoholic* Peeps

lauded...applauded, in bursting sentiment!

"Liver-Man" heard this energy from outside

as the eighty-five--hearts opened wide--

sent their group-conscious spirit and well wishes

after him...to meet him...

And PRAYER!

On the third day he walked, talked,

felt so good. He confided in me:

"I could hear my group, my friends,

cheering and (href, href, href) while clearing

my throat ...and eyes,

suddenly realized...

at THAT MOMENT 

I felt Less

Stress.

All which was left was LOVE, PEACE,

FAITH and TRUST--in my Higher Power,

My God, as He expressed himself through

all those Peeps that day."

--Steve E (aka steveroni)

*recovering alcoholic Peeps 

Published for dVERSE POETRY

OLN (Open Link night. 

Post AFTER 3 PM Tuesday

Photo Image of 

field of poppies in Early Dawn

by Adam Edwards, In DeviantArt

NUMBER EIGHT-Teen WHEELS

UNDIQUE

Latin term meaning:

"from all parts, from every quarter

on all sides, on every part

all around, everywhere.."

Expresses being attacked,

no chance of escape.

It is the same feeling I had 

on my scooter yesterday, while...

Riding down the long road

up and down hills

thinking of my loved ones

and how to pay the bills.

Out from nowhere she blows,

storm-of-storms, for me 

drenched through to my bones

so I almost didn't see

overpass, a mile ahead.

Maybe I can swing over--

and under...and

MY GOD, WHERE ALL THESE

F'N TRUCKS GONNA LAND?

Everywhere I see is wheels--

in agreed-on denominations of eighteens

as I'm riding here at 80/per

sitting in biting rains and well-soaked jeans

LATER

Scared? Nah! Well...a little--grin!

Made it to under the next bridge

seven miles beyond. (And ya know what?)

Believe this:

I knelt down on the sidebar of I-95,

thanked God and Flex--I'm still alive.

Also for the shelter, blessed am I.

Flex is my Guardian Angel,

name really "Flexibelle"

The TRUTH? Having more fun than EVER 

could I imagine on this 18-day ride!

Nearly each mile a learning experience

Back home in Naples this weekend.

LOVE and PEACE, Peeps!

--Steve E  (aka steveroni)

Published on "Week #58" in dVERSE

CHOICES

 My two Blog-Friends

have choice to make:

up or down,

here or there...

somewhere

anywhere,

aye or nay

to go or stay.

Many 'turning points' on life's road

When melded together

almost become circular.

The following poem came to mind

while commenting on Jessie's blog, soooo...

A POEM

Thinking piety

and mixing anxiety;

decisions on wait

leave naught but action

without any distraction

--or we will be late

I...waiting with you,

and listening, hearing God, too.

For now...not breathing

And 'talking' to Him

Who everything has made

Who all things bade.

"Follow, not wallow

in My footsteps...

wherever they may lead

to plant timeless seed!"

LOVE and PEACE!

Steve E

(in DEVIANT ART) "circel" by
dekleinewildebizon-d53fx01

LOST, FOUND, LOST, FOUND!

This almost didn't get posted.

Some force pushed to publish:

THE RIDE

"...follow the yellow brick road..."

Scooter trip Friday to Tampa was like a dream. You can believe this or not...while riding I prayed for two Peeps who are having rough times this week. As I meditated, three hours passed as twenty minutes. (That was exaggeration—grin!) OK Peeps, I'll get down and personal, got nothing to lose—grin!

MEDITATION!

I contemplated, my mind felt like 'in training'. Much more than one of 'those' moments. Emptied of all busyness, God's Goodness settled into my brain. Gratitude—not for specifics, but for the Gift of all life--overtook Suzuki's 85 mph.

As mile markers tried to catch Suzuki and me, reflection kept me in a state of --difficult to explain--like experiencing grace, a feeling of safety, not from natural disaster, but, well, I felt suddenly shielded from the enemy, e.g., from concupiscence. If I followed God's Will, I'd be 'untouched', so to speak? What I needed, wanted, was faith. I received a blind faith during this travel-time. “The gift of Faith”, I've heard and read. Indeed! It is so--a gift!

Is it finally—at last—time to let God take over my life, run the show? So what happened? I lost my driver's license, not misplaced... LOST! Prior to this day, I would have panicked. But it did not happen. Peeps, this is big-time for me! So...first test passed!

Later, still in relaxed mode, someone asked me if I lost my DL. They had found it! It seemed as a reward (I KNOW this ain't so!) for passing my first-day exam. Will let you know how this works out—truth will be posted in 30 days. Meanwhile, I'm sober, happy and free...and that IS truth, OK?

BLESSINGS! 

ONLY GOD CAN MAKE A TREE

(Edited from first publishing September 2009)

WARNING!! This re-post concerns
 prayer, meditation and God--
AS EACH UNDERSTANDS GOD
--OR NOT!

*

SILENCE!

I recall in grade one, Sister Rose Gertrude --when all else would fail--shouted (her whole four feet of body shaking) "SILENCE!"  And boy, would we get quiet.  A pin dropping sounded like baseball bouncing on floor.

 SHHHHHH!

In the small country church, at certain times during mass, quiet was so quiet, it was LOUD.  But quiet lent itself to momentary feelings of peace, serenity.  I remember counting my heartbeats, because I could hear them, in the silence.
 
Early in sobriety, a man told me when I 'talk' to God, to be quiet, and know that He is God, not me.   This was my first inkling how to 'implement' meditation and prayer, how to start.  I realized then, that quietness had to be a part of it.
 
I have seen people praying agitatedly, gripping their hands together, and with furrowed, sweaty brow, trying to 'decode' God, and that may be good for some Peeps. 

My praying has evolved into a more meditative mode.  I sometimes simply desire to be with God, just be there, and enjoy the moments. (After all, God knows what I need and/or want--grin!)

NOTE: I believe there is no 'right' nor 'wrong' way to pray, Okay?!! My OWN opinion continues:

 
Meditation is union with God.  If I am upset, making plans, counting minutes or rosary beads while wishing I were somewhere else, it is very difficult to form that Oneness.  
 
One word can start me off—Silence! Being quiet is a beginning of meditation.  Each event, the beginning of a new life.  

In August 2009 a 3,000-mile 17-day scooter ride to Virginia was for me a life-changing event. That experience allows me to look now at the universe in a totally new way.
 
My beliefs may change over time. They will not alter this fact: my whole self felt then and now-- different. A new person inhabits this skeleton.  A few Peeps might might scoff, but I know what I know.
 
My gratitude-of-the-moment was and is for people God arranged for me to meet during my ride.  Several taught me valuable lessons, by baring their souls to me, a stranger. Others, caring and sharing, were at church celebrations, AA meetings. Still others were those random meetings of strangers in the night! And how wonderful are those chance encounters,  spiritual moments happening with open sharing of our disease--humanness.
 

Meditation goes beyond limitation of words and thoughts.  In early schooling I was told Who God is. I had been given an image of God.  But none of that is as I now imagine.  I make no attempt in word or thought to visualize God.

Hundreds of years ago a mystic wrote in The Cloud of Unknowing,  "You want to know God? There is only one way of knowing Him:  By unknowing."  I must get beyond my mind and thought. Only then am I able to perceive Him with my heart.
 
And in noiseless moments, stillness, quiet, silence, I can "know God", at first vaguely, then more and more clearly as time endures. I can live in Him and He in me.  

Wake up now, Steve! There are some roses to smell...

Peeps?..............oh, THERE you are!
Peace.
Love.
Steve

Posted by steveroni

September 16, 2009

 *ACORN DRAWING (SQUIGGLING!)

--BY CES P ADORIO

MY GOOD FRIEND

PRAYING FOR YOU PEEPS

AMENDED: We are now receiving rain and 25 m/p/h/ 

gusts so far away (200 miles) from the storm center.

Significance is that we can tell even more, 

what a dangerous lady is Irene...12 noon Eastern

Dear Peeps who live on the 

eastern seaboard, and inland

it is time to be responsible to yourselves. Please do not act from fear, but do whatever you are able to protect your lives first and then property.



My urgent prayer is for your safety in Charleston, SC and on northward to Maine and beyond. I ask that God will spare you any tensions and stress which are not necessary of that..


Already this Thursday morning at 6 AM I felt strong breezes from this Hurricane Irene, and we are 200 miles to the west of her inimitable forces.


With LOVE, I wish for all of you...SAFETY and PEACE!
Sincerely,

Steve E.

Image of the gold cross is my own, 

which I wear for you Peeps in way 

of the storm this weekend.....S

DIMENSION SO DEEP

THIS may be a re-post: not certain. 

What I AM certain is that this may be 

THE MOST EMBARRASSING MOMENT 

OF MY LIFE

Actually, this should be a category, with separate files spanning years, because I have experienced so MANY extraordinarily embarrassing events .  This following comes to mind tonight.  


During the years 1991-1995 I drove a van for Transportation Disadvantaged in Naples, Florida.  The company was called Community Transportation, or "CT".  

In my pocket I kept with me at all times a compact digital voice recorder for keeping notes to myself since I had so many "great"--Ha! thoughts during a work day, thoughts which would all but evaporate by the time I got home.  I had no time to stop and write notes to myself.

During one trip my load of passengers were retarded people coming home from work.  We had every day such a wonderful time of it, joking, laughing, and making fun of each other, how we talk, behave, etc. They loved it and I did also

I was so spiritually overcome with the happenings of the hour, I grabbed my handheld to record memories of the moment, and said some of--for me--the most beautiful expressions of faith and love.  

I spoke to relatives who had long been buried, I spoke to saints, to Mary, the Mother of God...and to Jesus.  I told them all of my gratitude, for the many gifts, in my life, especially that gift of sobriety.  I asked God to bless my handicapped passengers, my family, my fellow drivers, and my superiors at work.  And I praised our Lord for the peace, serenity and SOBRIETY He gave me, so that I might help those who still suffer from whatever illnesses.  And I made a promise to do better, to seek His will in all matters,  and asked for His help to carry out His work.  

As I reached to place the digital recorder back into my pocket, I felt 'IT'.  The recorder had been in my pocket the whole time. (Well, what am I holding in my hand, into WHAT had I been talking?)...N E X T : 

Earlier, I had inadvertently grabbed the company two-way radio microphone, and had been sending my ultra private thoughts out over the air!  EVERYTHING I'd said had been broadcast to the base office, overheard by the dispatcher, by my boss and all the office staff, and by ALL the drivers and ALL the passengers on ALL the buses that afternoon.

At the end of my shift, no one said a word about the incident.  Everyone behaved normally toward me, so that I got to thinking, well, maybe I had not pressed the transmitting button.  Maybe nobody heard a thing of my secret,  but verbal, soul-thinking.  Several days went by, and, you know, I was allowing myself to forget the whole episode.  

Then, one early morning drivers were doing our pre-trip inspections, and collecting our manifests for the day. One driver--one of the few who had always been friendly towards me--approached and said, "What the hell was that all about, the other day?  You were talking on the radio for a *long, long* time, and made no sense whatever. At least 50 employees, bosses, and the passengers of 14 buses all over town, were trying to catch every word."

Everyone has been wondering "...did the Oh!--SO-sober A.A. guy finally start drinking ? Were you hallucinating? On drugs--or WHAT?"
 
To this day I can bring up those spiritual minutes, then immediately re-feel the horrible discovery and shock of terror.

Guess I'll finish this off with...AMEN!


NOTE: Yesterday, 16 years after, a driver 'pushing' a concrete mixer asked me, "Do you remember that time...." So it became today's post in Fourth Dimension!