Drinking Alcohol taught me how to fly
Then it took away the sky....

Wednesday, July 25, 2012

RE-SEARCHING

Did not realize how strongly addicted I am to this computer.
Not only blogging, but downloading, 
uploading, FB, chat, email, Texting, 
installing and trying out things,
building (learning how) a Website
Until my computer has been down for couple days
Will try to catch up with all my Peeps!!! 

 
SEARCHING

Are you 'out there'
or rather, are you here?
And if you are so near
why is it not such
that I'm feeling your touch?

My body, mind, heart, soul, yearn.
Which, oh! which way do I turn?
The awfulness is I do not know
for what, where, when, or who.

Maybe it is simply God I seek?
Or is His Will I fear more
to be shown...so to view?
Possible it is God--in You?
keeping me meek, not weak.

Been given power so clearly
dearly lacking--
strength to conquer what
was found wanting,
daunting--

Therein lives unknown and known..
what sincerely I think when alone.

With one or the other,
even sweeter...er,
someone yet else,
my whole life-focus
can change
to focus-less
obscurity

Former obligations
now a way-of-life
whether goodness
or epitome
of selfishness.

So I continue to beat on myself.
Why, when already desolate?
Private version of 'assolvo me'?
Time would nigh dissolve me,
surrounded by dreaded knell,
Adagio-droning bell
 
Every puzzle,
missing spaces
sprinkled among seen
highlight unseen.

Oh please let me be
one who sees that
You are not 'out there'...
rather you are here.
And I love you!

--steveroni 
(Re-worked poem
another Blog of mine
from 2010)

Posted for d'Verse Poets Pub
- OpenLinkNight - Week #54
Line up every Tuesday, 3 pm EDT.

Image:  
Searching for by dj fede888
in Deviant Art



26 comments:

  1. I do not remember your last poem, but I like this one, and I know I've been looking out in the dark many times.

    After reading a bed time story, my three year old daughter out of the blue asked, "Mama, how far away is God?"
    One of those moments; I just had to find the right answer immediately.
    The words from Psalm 121 came spontaneously. "The Lord is the shadow by your right hand." "Is that true." "It says so here." The happy laughter of the child playing with her fingers in the shadow of the nightstand lamp. "Is he here? And here? And here?"
    First then I realized, He was there.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. One of the most beautiful, meaningful comments I've read in a long time--anywhere.
      PEACE! And thank you, Felisol!

      Delete
  2. Its great to stay and feel connected.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yup, since we really ARE connected (my belief!) it is great to also FEEL that way! Thanks.
      PEACE!

      Delete
  3. I can't survive without computers too ~

    Lovely reflections Steve...I specially like "keeping me meek, not weak." Challenges keep us strong but with our loved ones, we can see ourselves through these times ~

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Survival in a non-electronic world--difficult to imagine, huh? Nice to know "I am not alone" in my addiction!

      Delete
  4. trust me brother...i understand the addiction....i think it is the connection we make that draws me again and again...and that we are not alone...and lets face it i know as much if not more about you all than some people i know IRL....ok, so i do care....smiles...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Brian I have no doubt you know me better than I know me--grin! FACT!

      Aren't we all more alike than not? 'Methinks' sO!

      Thanks ....and PEACE!

      Delete
  5. Addicted I am. Hello. My name is She Writes and I'm a techaholic :).

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. SueAnn, I guess it is our "mission-in-life" to
      start a meeting TechAnon...we meet any time 24-hours a day...maybe in FacialBook or we could send 'Creeps' on "Creeper"

      Be like drunks having AA meeting during Happy Hour in the Do-Drop-Inn!!!
      --grin!
      PEACE!
      Steve

      Delete
  6. I am again having trouble with commenting on your post and the fact I let it upset me so, tells me I may too have an addiction. :) Technology frustrates me.
    Searching is such a driving force in my life. I understand the need to make contact. What a spacey comment this is and what does it say of me that I don't feel the need to fix it??? :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Very touching...NOT SPACEY. Understand?
      OK!
      PEACE, N.

      Delete
  7. lovely! and yes one doesn;t realize how dependent one in on certain things till they go missing!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh Yuvika, I have sO much catching up in front...comp was out two days, set me back a month--grin! Thanks for comment--I'll get over there to visit. Yours is regularly a continuing excellence.
      PEACE!

      Delete
  8. Steve, we are all addicted to social media, aren't we ? But I love the connections I have made in this wonderful place. Peace and Love.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. OMG Yes, as I look back (thanks to your comment--grin!) and begin to realize all that has happened, good and the bad, in these 4+ years here, I see that everything about my quality of life has been greatly enhanced, from associations made right here! (And I LOVE IT ALL!!!!)
      Thank you. PEACE, and more!
      Steve

      Delete
  9. Therein lives unknown and known..

    though keep blogging, downloading,
    uploading, FB, chat, email, and Texting.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Lovely poem. Insights are deep and honest.

    I think that my laptop is one of the best things that ever came into my life. It connects me with the rest of the world in such an amazing, unbelievable but true, way.

    Just stopped by to see how you have been.

    Blessings
    Lidia

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You put an early-morning smile on my face with your comment.
      Loving.
      PEACE!
      Steve

      Delete
  11. I bet you'll find that special inner-connection throughout the day today! Safe bet!

    :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Jess, that 'special' inner connection is
      everywhere, anywhere and elsewhere today.
      I would have to sit, quiet down and focus
      on the past 10 hours--since I got up at 5 AM.
      Time for nap! (See? that's what you have
      to look forward to many years in future--grin!)

      Some of today, Id like to discuss with you.
      Maybe there will be time.
      PEACE!

      Delete
  12. WoW! You've no idea how this line spoke to me:

    'Former obligations now a way-of-life whether goodness or epitome of selfishness'

    ReplyDelete
  13. Wow man...
    You are so deep and clear in your wise search of words to convey all you do convey, peep.

    Extraordinary.

    Be well, keep blogging now and then... but please do not get too addicted, instead, go for a walk... :-) grin.
    I knoe so well you do not fear God...(Thank God!)


    Thank you always for being a so faithful follower and commenter as our dear friend, Brian.

    You are just a unique jewel of life getting along...

    ooxxx

    D.

    ReplyDelete
  14. I have been reading Scott Pecks book Different Drum- all about "Community"
    and how to create a genuine one! (Our lovely fellowship follows or perhaps I ought to say, Mirrors: his 4 stages. ( out there and in here!) Thanks :)

    ReplyDelete