Drinking Alcohol taught me how to fly
Then it took away the sky....

Wednesday, October 17, 2012


 Yesss, it is still me
so busy bee,
being here--or there
certainly somewhere.

Too often, too busy.
Continuous quarrel within:
is this--or that--sin?

Do I live under
my cafeteria
of criteria,
rather than suffer 
in deliria?

Put it to rest with a "grin"... 

"busy" waits. However,
"hovering" sometimes 
owns my soul, brain,
Pride and Ego remain (HA!)

I've learned--
and sometimes forgot,
this program for recovery
is not a plot...but 
a "new way of life"  

 Must remember:
in my veins--sap,
not blood. but
spiritual strength
passed from God 
through you Friends.

OH! My Peeps!
Needing you now:
nurturing kindnesses
to heal heart-scars;
suturing experiences for 
sewing soul's open wounds.

So busy!
Being there and here,
everywhere...is it why
--except for this moment--
I be happy, free, 
joyfully SOBER?

It always happens in October (true!)
that memory-bytes return to tell me
I should not be allowed to enjoy this 
freedom from chaos, fear. 
Oh God...please heal
my SELFishNESS. 

No wish to isolate
nor again hibernate.
Let me be busy
but not so busy
that I do not recognize 
Your Presence in 
my Peeps.

Knowing nothing,
believing anything, 
I ask You God, to lift 
small corner of the 
curtain of my unknowing.

 --Steve E  (aka steveroni) 
Posted with only  
14 minutes to go


 Google Images


  1. Very well said Steve and so from the heart.

  2. Do I live within
    the cafeteria
    of my criteria,
    rather than suffer
    in this deliria....great question...and friends or peeps def heal the heart man....thats why i love having you around...smiles...it does happen in october....fall...and can get heavy...so keep it light brother...

    1. You every time come through with what I need to read/hear, Mr Brian-Peep. Your comments are often the solution for many of the Peeps--
      ±90% ...OKOK--100%--grin!

      Guess this is proof ya cannot BS a BSer. I got to warn you again...your continued warm comments are setting up a GUARANTEED re-visit to Virginia sometime in 1213.

      (NOTE: Someone will surely ask, "Steve, who is Virginia?")
      Answer: Virginia is EAST of WEST, that's all I know...er, believe

      LOVE and PEACE to you, Bro!

  3. we are all waaaay too busy, and when we aren't we look for things to keeeep busy... total madness... we do need to learn to sit still, listen, hear, do nothing but breathe... and keep life in balance. it keeps the mind in balance. and the rest will follow naturally...

    1. Yup Shadow, it is that same old line, which too often I lose sight of:

      "Be still...and know that He is God--not me!"

      (Conversation: "Mommie, what is BALANCE?"
      "Honey, it's like when you stand up, and don't fall down!")
      Love and PEACE, Verena.

  4. Busy is good, it is a blessing. I love your writing Steve.

    1. Agree, Fazlisa! "Busy" is good. But Peeps are telling me that too much of anything is NOT good. (And I always ALwAYS want too much of everything!)
      PEACE, Fazlisa--what a beautiful name :-)

  5. Seeing HP IN OTHERS! indeed! that's how mine works often.Had a wonderous day yesterday- went to Bill W. Birthplace! *GRIN*

    1. I bet that was a "spiritual experiene"...is that correct? We visitied once--in off-season October--Dr Bob's House in Akron, Ohio. And yes, it WAS a spiritual experience!

      Thanks for sharing your "wondrous day yesterday" here!

  6. I am busy too.

    Busy to keep myself happy.

    1. Ahhh! Maybe THAT'S the way it works!
      Another day--happy again.

  7. Some people see the fall as a sad season...a dying time. I see it as a time to prepare to rest. To draw close to me those things that strengthen me and allow me to rest and renew through the winter to spring's rebirth. I like this time of slowing down and taking the time to look around and appreciate all that God has given dressed in reds and golds.
    Dare I say it? Yes, I shall! I LOVE this line...
    "I ask You God, to lift
    small corner of the
    curtain of my unknowing."
    Blessing be to you, my friend.

    1. Yesss, Magpie, we are not here to "know" things, but to follow a path without knowing. However, it is SUCH fun to smell a HERSHEY bar, even if I cannot eat it (like in Walgreens?--grin!).

      So maybe God could just release a little smell of heaven--probably it is surrounding us...called the Universe!

  8. http://youtu.be/I85ApzR43jU




    1. Loved "Amazing grace"

      "Don't Worry"...obviously appropriate

      SMILE (though your heart is aching, breaking) by Nat King Cole--watch out, tsunami on the way...tears

      Thank you, Jessie
      ♥ my Friend!

  9. Replies
    1. Me, too. Smiling again. Thank God (and His Peeps like you) these moments--days--are not frequent.

  10. I enjoyed reading this, its pretty nice and different, I have read something like this for the first time, ""busy" waits." Good words!

    1. Ma'am, you picked out the essence of what I was thinking. Congratulations. Now I have visited your blog and your photographs--you are GoooD! And Kolkata, India! And Angels! OMG, and age 20....

      My special "Guardian Angel" I named Flex--short for Flexible, which it must be to help me--grin! He has been with me, pulling me away from flames for 79½ years. You might consider to give your angels names, otherwise when you talk with one of them, how do they know which one? Hmmm? I am serious about that....

      Also, on your blog, I sent you a special gift, since you like the song "On a Jet Plane" so much. Hope you like it!!!!

      So I wish for you PEACE Dark Angel!
      Steve E

  11. what happens in October that brings you to that edge, I wonder. When the dark side approaches me, I tend to lean on God more, I don't know of any other way to get around it. You are surrounded by many friends, it seems and october will be over soon

    1. Thank God, October almost over...if I can find your email address, I'll explain a bit more about October...but you are SO RIGHT. Serenity Prayer works also--for me!

  12. To where do these steps lead? Does this mean that if the fish follow these steps all the way to the top, they will find themselves out of water? Good morning! My, you are full of excitement today. Now it is my turn. Must brew coffee. Darn puppies waking me so so early in the morning!!! Tsup!

    1. Fish--as everyone else who climbs those steps--will find themselves in heaven. IMAGINE! On Fridays all the fried fish you can eat
      --in HEAVEN!!!

  13. I guess one could view those steps as leading to the unknown, to someplace murky. But I'd like to think those are steps coming out from the unknown and into clarity. Into greener pastures. A few more steps, my friend, and you will be clear of October.

    You are always so kind and generous with your comments. I can't help but smile when I read them. Tsup!

    1. Bella, even climbing a mountain, do not the steps (trails) go up, then down, the more up, etc. Without any "down", one might never reach the highest peak.

      But I like also your "greener pastures" and "clarity" analogies.

      Hey girl, Ces and Manon Doyle reside in my sidebar up top. Ther has long been a space waiting there for an art piece by you. I'll think about it and pick one of my favs out for that place/post.

      Thank you for being my friend! PEACE.