Drinking Alcohol taught me how to fly
Then it took away the sky....

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

A DIMENSION OF DELUSION

The following story is true, as of last night
Only the name has been changed, and June
With a phone list of recovering women
Found herself at a turning point in her life.





JUNE.
SEE JUNE.
SEE JUNE RUN.
RUN JUNE RUN!

This is June. Her real name is...June!
It is her first visit to a meeting of
Alcoholics Anonymous.

She and I have  been  
Friends nearly five years.
June is a musician.
She is not an alcoholic.
That's what she says

Only drinks a few beers in late morning
Maybe a couple before bed
Wine only at 'lunch' and 'dinner'
Every day
(Just wants to "see what AA is like"!)
June "has a friend with a drinking problem"

Yeah! Right!
There are many who want to
Go to an AA meeting, saying
"Hi! I'm June. I'm just here to audit
Find out what it's like"

The corners of 154 pair of AA lips
Slightly curl at the tips
Each brain cell ringing that bell
Understood all too well...

"See what it's like?"
Hmmmmm!

I have observed hundreds of them,
Men and women
Who are today sober
By the Grace of God 
(as each understands Him)
The same God
Who brought them here

To "See what is it like."

Some
Who came to "analyze"
Finally came to realize
One lonely, difficult day
That they came
To stay.
Posted by at

29 comments:

  1. Ces AdorioFebruary 22, 2011 at 4:04 PM

    Yeah right! If I go to an AA meeting you will all think I am just in denial then? I have a friend who goes to AA and has asked me to come. I am teetotaler and if I say I don't drink, you will smirk at me?

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  2. Brian MillerFebruary 22, 2011 at 4:20 PM

    smiles. yeah she has a friend alright...and when her time of need comes i hope she finds another...

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  3. ClaudiaFebruary 22, 2011 at 4:25 PM

    this is encouraging - great she stayed..

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  4. DulceFebruary 22, 2011 at 4:34 PM

    if she is by your side she'll realize...
    :)

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  5. steveroniFebruary 22, 2011 at 4:40 PM

    Ces, usually I do not much care for Peeps who have never drank. But you're OK--grin! People who never used alcohol often look askance at those of us who compulsively obsessed over our drug, would fight for it...or worse. It was a physical necessity.

    But I realize you understand--because you are that way with your utterly AWESOME talent which God lent to you to help Peeps be HAPPY. And you do fantastic work in that regard.

    There MUST be an "ARTIST'S ANONYMOUS" meeting somewhere. If there is not--well, START one! But you don't stop drawing!!! You just 'taper off' a bit.

    WHATEVER you do, I support, not that it matters to you, but I feel strongly that your talents will not pass away. Your mind is probably--even at work--playing with drawing or painting details of one or the other kind.

    PEACE!

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  6. Ces AdorioFebruary 22, 2011 at 4:42 PM

    I really cannot stand the smell of alcohol. It makes my brain think violent thoughts. I have worked too many Christmas and New Year's Eve shifts where blood and alcohol mix and I have wrapped too many bodies during those holidays. I am so glad you are sober. Also the drunks forget and can't remember while I remember everything! But I love a full wine refrigerator and I love wine glasses, especially champagne flutes, the longer the stem, the better. I love crystals and dishes and I love beautiful table settings. I used to drink piesporter spatlese or auslese but it is expensive and I can only tolerate half a glass. My husband does not really like sweet wines, so I end up drinking Coke. Have you seen my table settings? I was so proud to take a photo and then I realized the kids put cans of Coke right on the table.

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  7. AnonymousFebruary 22, 2011 at 5:07 PM

    ... hm, I went with a friend to AA. Her husband has severe problems with alcohol, he does not want help. My friend then went to the group of the AA-family, where she got help ... until her husband was ready for withdrawal, and then AA ...
    that was an important experience for me ...
    AA is a blessing ...

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  8. Sober JulieFebruary 22, 2011 at 5:31 PM

    I'm glad June stuck around....and that I did.

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  9. CindyFebruary 22, 2011 at 8:33 PM

    nice post, was just thinking about my neighbor..wondering what her story will end like. I've never chatted w/ her when she's been sober, never. Just today, on the news, (all the channels) her 2nd husband has been arrested for his 4th offense DUI, driving on suspension, leaving the scene of a personal injury accident, open container and a BAC of .361. Wow. BUT, as a grateful member of Al Anon, all I can do is be available for her if she seeks me out. Yeah, I'll knock on her door in the next day or two and give her a hug. But, NO advice from me, just a shoulder and hug.

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  10. steveroniFebruary 22, 2011 at 10:51 PM

    BRIAN!
    You devil, you! Of course she already has a sponsor she calls 'godmother'..

    CLAUDIA!
    Of course she stayed, but I did not know that until today. Good for you to read about recovery, you may be in position to aid someone in finding help one day. Gute!

    DULCE!
    She may or may not realize--but she will have plenty of help from her AA girl-Peeps if this is "her time"...Hey, I'll have to go visit you, see what's new in Dulceville.

    CES!
    For the life of me, I cannot find your 'dishes' blog where are all those "House Beauty" photos, but I KNOW I've been there some time ago!

    COSIMA!
    Hey girl! You got some first-hand experiences. I believe everyone knows another who has a serious problem. Now you know where to send them when the time is right! Gute!

    SOBER JULIE!
    Believe me, I am glad also that 'she' stuck around, and that YOU did, and me, too! www means What a Wonderful World

    CINDY!
    This guy will certainly blame his misfortunes on SOMEONE else, hopefully not his wife. We can be OH! So mean, when our only defense is to be offensive. When you reach out to this woman, you are doing God's work. If she doesn't respond, it is not your biz. My sponsor told me that Alanon is a BETTER program than AA for a number of reasonable reasons--to many for here, now. Blessings to you!

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  11. Justjanesinsaneblog@blogspot.comFebruary 23, 2011 at 2:43 AM

    I once went to an Al anon meeting, and was the only person who showed up. It was one of my first meetings, and it pissed me off!!!

    If you knew how much money I have spent, sending others in my family to treatment, you would understand. All the focus is on the sick one. All the money you saved, (hid) from the alcoholic, used to save their life. Tens of thousands of dollars.

    I could see myself going somewhere, just to understand. Al anon has some value, but by the time you drag yourself there, you are exhausted from holding the family together.

    The best thing I ever did, was attend aftercare with my Husband for 6 months. I was the only spouse, the rest of the people were in treatment. I learned to value everything, there.

    So now you know, why maybe someone would attend a meeting, who is not an alcoholic. As for June, I would say...a first step in the right direction.

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  12. Crown of BeautyFebruary 23, 2011 at 3:22 AM

    Hi steve,
    I read a few of your recent posts. All good. I love this new blog of yours - the honest and the openness help us all in our journey.

    It is good when our pants are down too... then with the unexpected "exposure" of things we'd rather keep hidden, the hiding places of the enemy (pride) are dismantled... There is more that can be done with humility and honesty. Really.

    Thanks for sharing your life with us in an artistic and poetic way Steve.

    BTW, I'm glad Jane found a reason to stay. Sometimes they need to be accepted at face value. It helps them get out of denial.
    As long as we do not end up becoming their codependents...

    Blessings on your day, friend.

    Lidj

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  13. AnonymousFebruary 23, 2011 at 10:11 AM

    Just dropping by to say Hi :)

    ReplyDelete
  14. UnknownFebruary 23, 2011 at 10:23 AM

    I have a friend like that. Welcome to June! Even if it is just February, may she find her Peace with us.
    Sue
    aka - fishing
    aka
    just Sue

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  15. Jess Mistress of MischiefFebruary 23, 2011 at 10:56 AM

    I'm glad I audited the class and came to understand that I'm in a lifetime learning program :)

    You are one of the wonderful "classmates" I have come to love and feel a kinship with :)

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  16. HaddockFebruary 23, 2011 at 12:10 PM

    Good to know she stuck around and made it to the surface.
    The real culprits are the ones who encourage their "frinds" to take up drinking "for company"

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  17. MagpieFebruary 23, 2011 at 9:22 PM

    As you say...thank God that they find their way to people who care and can help.

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  18. Enchanted OakFebruary 24, 2011 at 12:38 AM

    Today I was thinking what a gift is that moment of clarity when the scales drop from our eyes and we see for the first time that we are alcoholics. Some don't get that moment. To have received it, I believe is God's grace. Thanks for your encouragement on my blog today, Steve. Give my good wishes to Prayer Girl, please?

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  19. steveroniFebruary 24, 2011 at 12:47 PM

    AYESHA!
    Thank you. Do you own that HD Photo Recovery business in Scottsdale AR? Otherwise, I cannot find your blog. PEACE!

    ENCHANTED OAK!
    Chris, you are so right! Other moments I enjoy remembering: first day I recall not have thought about booze A FULL DAY; (Same) A FULL WEEK; When I realized I could stay sober through Illness, cancer, Family death, Others' drinking, Divorce, war, etc., No Matter What (NMW)...

    MAGPIE!
    Thank God they find their way, and some of those come to STAY--by following a few simple rules, and doing some work on behavioral CHANGE--grin! nd by not drinking...PEACE!

    HADDOCK!
    The usual reason a 'friend' will encourage another to drink, or drink more than they wish--is to have "company" so it doesn't look like the 'friend' is drinking too much. Yes, drunks hang together, as do 'former' drunks. PEACE!

    JESS!!!!!
    Yessss dear, we are "clssmates" in the study of living--sans alcohol--or muriatic acid, or valium, Listerine, etc., etc. Love and PEACE!

    SMD!
    Yep, we are all in this boat which is no lobger sinking. Ohhh, so YOU are "Just Sue" Is that like "Just Jane"?--grin!

    JANICE!
    Drop by ANY time, Janice. You are that breath of fresh air. PEACE!

    LIDJ!
    YOU know something about this stuff, woman. (Using words like 'codependent') I gave a talk this morning, and dismantled a few more of Pride's hiding places! You bring a special brand of spirituality to us on the blogs--which I need to hear on a regular timetable. So many thanks for what you do here--and elsewhere! PEACE, dear LIDJ!

    JUST JANE!
    Good, girl! You know as well as I or anyone (well not all!) that this is a matter of what works...WORKS! There is not one-size-fits-all . Figured I spent $80,000-90,000 on booze before I stopped drinking in 1974. Now, I might spend some of that on HERSHEY BARS, Ummmmm!--grin! PEACE!

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  20. UnknownFebruary 24, 2011 at 1:22 PM

    What a great post! So true, we come to try to figure out why we're NOT alcoholics and if we stay and practive we find out that we have lives, loves, and an amazing life in front of us...

    good luck to June.

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  21. steveroniFebruary 24, 2011 at 1:41 PM

    Yeah, Gabi!
    If I had not been allowed to go down as far as I did, I would never have FOUND this AA thing! Only if I hit a real bottom, will I qualify...and be able to continue, No Matter What.

    I'm going to let June read all these posts, it could help her--she does not 'compute', actually just does not OWN one. Bye for now, Gabi. PEACE!

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  22. JeremyRTFebruary 24, 2011 at 2:24 PM

    I'm grateful for all the stay & choose something else. Just for that day. It shows amazing courage and keeps me comin!

    ReplyDelete
  23. signed...bkmFebruary 24, 2011 at 8:12 PM

    Steve this is amazing and wonderful....reminds me of my brothers work at a place called Valley Hope in AZ....he is a Chaplain and counselor...he also has written a of short stories entitled the "The Sins and Redeemption of Janice T"...
    He has just start a blog ..not really know the ins and outs of it..maybe you can have a peek and leave a couple of words to encourage him to blog on....his is still hooked on perfection even after being sober for 30 years....

    http://wmkornovich.wordpress.com/

    I have learned so much from AAs principles and my husband being recovering too....blessings...bkm

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  24. Ellie KingsFebruary 24, 2011 at 10:23 PM

    We all need help in one thing or another. And most times we're not ready to confront our fears or face the facts, speaking for myself. I hope your friend continues getting the help she needs. Enjoy your weekend Steve.

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  25. UnknownFebruary 25, 2011 at 2:14 AM

    so much pain in the world Steve - wrote one tonight

    I sometimes wonder how anyone once trapped pulls free - but for God's grace

    thanks for being in the stop gap!!

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  26. illustration poetryFebruary 25, 2011 at 2:43 AM

    hello there.

    ReplyDelete
  27. illustration poetryFebruary 25, 2011 at 2:44 AM

    dammit.
    sorry.
    wrong account.

    ReplyDelete
  28. illustration poetryFebruary 25, 2011 at 2:47 AM

    yea okay.
    sorry about that.

    thanks for your comments, you made me laugh, really :D

    ReplyDelete
  29. izzyFebruary 25, 2011 at 9:00 AM

    Thanks for sharing this! I had a wonderful
    time yesterday where a person who had worked up to step 4 came back after a dry spell (w/ no meetings) and had an AHA! moment- all because HP works in mysterious ways- for which I am very humbly glad to be a small part of....

    ReplyDelete

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