NOT IN VAIN

                        

It has not been in vain,

this training and teaching time...

time of suppression, repression, depression

is changed now into a time

of glorious expression.

--God Calling

(June 28, 2012)

YOSEMITE...AND THE WATER FLOW

LIKE OUR FLOWING LOVE--

NEVER REALLY CEASING

Above the photo, today's reading/meditation hit me right across the head. So often I feel guilt--no!--shame because of my own happiness. It's like, am I the only one who isn't full of negativity? (My perception tells me this.)

Even though I have obligations, they are MY responsibilities, my choices. I have the freedom to change them, to do or not.

Being bound to my own options in this life is just not the same as spending 40 or more hours each week at the behest of others. My work life began before age 10 on the farm, and lasted for 55 years. (Not all of them on the farm--grin!) Now I perform activities that--if they'd been 'requested' by authority--would have turned me quite far from enjoyment of life.

First, I am alcoholic. Second, I do not drink--for more than 38 years! You probably do NOT care for knowing how one IS an alcoholic, even after staying sober...so I won't expound on that now! Today, I practice 'being satisfied'. That helps me--to have no expectations of others (a few minutes of that is possible, now and then--grin!)

Doctor visit this morning ended my need for continuing liquid chemo on my face--I'm finally burnt to a crisp, took a 'before' photo moments ago. After 10+/- days of a special creme I will shoot another photo--'after'..and blog them. It may help someone to take more care of their skin when spending years in the sunshine--yeah...right!

--In a different 'vain', I said to doctor if she got rid of the ugliness, and kept the color, I'd be grateful.

Everyone I met this morning returned my Alien-like smiles, my face one big, bleeding bag of sores. And Peeps are just SO nice everywhere.

"God Calling" quote at top of post is my raison d'etre during this segment of my life. My training, learning how to live, is from a teacher named Alcoholics Anonymous. If I had not been a hopeless, helpless drunk, I'd never have allowed a Higher Power (God!) to lead me to AA. Does that connect with you? That I am forever grateful to God and AA? I was allowed to hit the bottom, the dregs of living. I'm truy grateful to BE a recovering Alcoholic!

I read, see, and trust many fellow Peeps in these blogs, and their words nurture me. I give support as well as receive it, through poetry, other writings, pictures, and "glorious expression". We share our experiences, strengths, and hopes here with any who would 'hear' or read.

Grace from God is continuing, never stopping. It just like "Where is all that water coming from?

My prayer is that all of us be allowed to continue these practices until God says, "YOU!  It's time now. C'mon along!"

PEACE, LOVE, and PRAISE!

--steveroni