Drinking Alcohol taught me how to fly
Then it took away the sky....

Tuesday, January 31, 2012

A FANTASY ON SILENCE



 SHHHHH!

Ah! Sweeter than all:
Silence! Utter quiet.
Outside of and
inside me.


 inside—that's
where troublesome
continues residence.
 
One quality makes
wonderful that world
of life prenatal...
SILENCE!
 
Is it that womb-life
which holds the
memory of
silence -so dear?
Then—so 'they' say--
next silence shall
happen at last breath,
in the tomb.
*
Not gloom! 
only another mystery, 
a life full of nothing old
*
'Tween womb and tomb:
calamitous existence,
life of breathing, doing--
*
HAPPENINGS!
*
and noise, noise, noise!
When will it stop?
Cannot stand it any more...

REALLY!

S T O P !!!!
*
*
*
Emptying my head
of noisy thought...
ALL thought.
Ah! Once more,
silence. PEACE!
Meditate.
Just "be with"
...the Universe
*
*
Only then, now--
the gift Enlightenment
chances to
immerse itself
into all.

-steveroni

NOTE: While riding, my head 
does empty somewhat
and these kinds of thoughts
drift by like a cinema
* NOT the cause of my accident! OK?--grin! *


Written for D'VERSE  Open Link Night, Week #29

Sunday, January 29, 2012

ETERNITY IS BETWEEN 'TIC' and 'TOC'




THE CLOCK

Before young turned old
I thought to live
always
and forever
Hickory, Dickory, Dock

I'd been told,
eons past, if
daily I wind this clock
never will experience
fateful day—my last.
Chiming, ticking,

Tocking

...as stories will go,
clouds drift, lift,
ravens wing swift
Voice from clock:
Sir, time will stay
and clocks will say
Wind me, Bro”
tick........tock!
Hickory, Dickory, Dock

Time went by.
Years passed,
life happened.


Old man try
never cry,
though he knew
end was here!
No fear, only
tick-tock of clock.

He said, “Well,
life's not forever
Heaven, hell,
whatever.......

They had told
ya never get old.
Only live right into
that next world of
(tick-tock) life.

He was a bit sad
There's no more sound
as clock is not wound
WHAT?!
Tick-tock....tick.....to-

Final breath
not 'bad',
just (sigh..)
all he had...
and die.
TICK
TOCK

Clock, ticking on-and-on
showed on its face
four-seventeen...
4:18.
4:19.
Tick—tock--tick--tock

Two mysteries
occurred that day.
Man: new life
--another place
Timepiece
moving also away.
*Tic*
Keeping its pace
from there to
(ka-bong)
Eternity
*Toc*

Time is a part of the measuring system used to sequence events, to compare the durations of events and the intervals between them, and to quantify rates of change such as the motions of objects

Since I side with those who believe that time is neither event nor thing, and thus is not itself measurable nor can it be traveled.
This clock is my favorite
It belongs to our household.

Steveroni







Saturday, January 28, 2012

THERE ARE NO ACCIDENTS



ALL SHOOK UP!


Had accident on my scooter, 11 AM last Tuesday. Rather than delve into all the aspects, I'll just say it is very lonely lying on the asphalt—under a scooter--in the intersection of a busy US 6-lane highway, and Central Avenue in Naples. Sirens, backed up traffic, horns, two cars damaged, two drivers taken to hospital. And at fault is me! No, I did not cry, Peeps—grin!


The Chris and Veronica story



First Peeps--really 'Angels'--to come out to help me, Veronica and Chris. One brought wet towels to clean up my face and arms, another brought out bag of ice for my head. They helped me to stand. They spoke kind, encouraging words.


One of the twenty-something girls said they had seen me at Meetings of Alcoholics Anonymous. Another angel, a scooter guy--also an AA-Peep!--showed up, The three of them picked up my quarter-ton bike. We all walked it to safety.



This all happened in front of a busy Starbucks. V brought out a Vente coffee (to replace the blood loss—kidding, Peeps!!!).



OK there's more: the girls stayed with me for hour and a half—young girls normally have nothing else to do in a beautiful, sunny 'city-on-the-beach' at 11 AM...right? They gave their version of the accident to police and offered themselves as witnesses in case that would be necessary. Also, V (in tears) felt so sorry for me and my fine, she tried to thrust a $100 bill on me. UNBELIEVABLE!



The shakes are gone. I am fine! All that's left is the cleanup. Thank God for helmets, shoes, and gloves...and Angels!


A 12th Step Story



In Alcoholics Anonymous, our 12th Step is partly devoted to helping others. Peeps assume that means helping others stay sober, and help them follow the program of living. Which id true.



Also true, we eventually learn to carry our message of happy life out into the world of everyday life. OK!



The Peeps who helped me had no other reason or agenda, than to be of service to another human. They practiced their program. And I was a recipient! What a thrill—also a learning experience, for me. I just 'let others' do what was difficult for me during those moments.



I got to witness AA 'working' in that wonderful way, when Peeps are willing to just put one foot in front of the other—and don't trip!--and get God's job done, in a cooperative human effort.



It was another in ongoing Spiritual Experiences for me! My gratitude again is for others who help their fellows, and for the God within each of us. In every web address, example: (http://www)...the 'www' stands for “What a Wonderful World”. Now that I've exposed the secret, it will probably become 'xxx'--grin!



Love and PEACE!

steveroni

Image of roses above were a 2011 Christmas gift-post from my Muslim friend, Izdiher (Pakistan). Thank you, Pak-Girl! I wanted something beautiful and cheerful, to head this post concerning my scooter accident.

Saturday, January 21, 2012

AUTHOR of LOVE



Posted without permission: Blogger Susan Deborah 
who I wish to honor here, a good friend. 
She is Indian (Asia). This photo just fit perfectly, my post:
 
WHO AM I....

The lover knocked at the door of his beloved. “Who knocks?” said the voice from within. “It is I,” said the lover.

"Go away. This house will not hold you and me.”

The rejected lover went away into the desert. There he meditated for months on end, pondering the words of the beloved. Finally he returned and knocked at the door again.

"Who knocks?”
"It is You.”

The door was immediately opened.


The 'voice' inside the house is God in heaven. Then there is me, Pride, attempting entrance. I learned one attribute is intolerable in heaven—egotistical PRIDE!

Two, maybe three poems ever I've written, for which I was proud. That feeling, like 'job well done' coursed through my body's highways. Not sinful, that.

Also, during my violin career...hundreds of times I 'knew' the performance was above average--grin! Not sinful, that...only a recognition of God's gift to me.

It is the art of “putting somebody down” or embarrass them in public, to build myself up...at which I am an expert, BTW. And that is BAD pride—for me.

Also, when I portray myself as 'less than' you, it is my bad Pride—Humility in reverse. That will also keep me out of that house.

...and whenever my motive in helping another, is to further my own perceived superiority-now THAT is big-time sinful behavior.

I love it when 'she' says, “There is not room enough here for both of us"--the 'one of us' being Ego! 

Well, there are SO many lessons to be learned...even at this late date. (Back to the desert--grin!)

Of course, the story “Who Am I?” is from De Mello, “SONG OF THE BIRD” Page 99...I posted it also about two years ago, and just needed to read it again. So YOU, the Peeps may read it again also—if ya wish.

Without a trace of Ego, or Pride, I write to you all now:
Love...and PEACE
steveroni

P.S. I SO glad that God is a forgiving Peep!!! 
Maybe Susan Deborah will forgive me also?--grin

Thursday, January 19, 2012

LIFE



NOTE: Yesterday (Wednesday) morning we met blogger Patti and her husband Bill. They live in Massachusetts. Most enjoyable 2-hour breakfast ever—maybe my first—grin! Again I must write that meeting a Peep--who I only knew through the blogs—is just like meeting a friend...we already know one another. It is always like that! Thank you, God!


LIFE AFTER DEATH? OR BEFORE?

"Some people say there is no life after death,” said a disciple.

"Do they?” said the Master, noncommittally.

"Wouldn't it be awful to die and never again see nor hear nor love nor move?”

"You find that awful?” said the Master. “But that's how most people are even before they die.”

Awakening”, #219 by De Mello

LISTEN TO THE SILENCE
Peeps, I'll try to be honest here. My life was never boring. I shoveled cow manure, and at age 12-13, raised a steer from calf-to-auction grade at the County Fair. I sat for years on a stage in tie-and-tails, playing violin in a major symphony orchestra.

I was a barman, bus driver, Ritz Carlton entertainer, sidewalk strolling musician. From a 25-year career of alcoholic drinking and behavior, I've become a long-time sober Peep.Ya know how I did that?  
Just didn't drink—and didn't die!

But I never really lived! Whatever I did was to please someone else—or so it seemed to me. Not that I was forced—just that I wanted everyone to like (love) me, so I became a certified people-pleaser—I THOUGHT......(How could I please another—others—when, in drunken stupor I was walking all over their lives, hopes, dreams?)

Finally,now, "I know a new freedom, a new happiness. I will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it. I comprehend the word 'serenity'--and know peace. No matter how far down the scale I've gone, I see how my experiences of the past can benefit others." *

Sure, all this sounds so goody-goody. Well, it is nowhere near perfect...but SO much better, I do not worry about 'perfect'--not any more!

This is certain: I shall not die “having never seen, nor heard, nor loved, nor moved!”

PEACE ALWAYS!


*Book "Alcoholics Anonymous" pp. 83-84 (slightly Edited)

Monday, January 16, 2012

ON BEING AWARE


Yes, we have heard the following story before, but it contains a moral of which I was not aware. Label me “slow learner”--that is not an excuse...it is truth.

THREE MINUS ONE EQUAL TWO

Pilot announced that a sputtering engine would soon cease to operate. Passengers were a Senator, a Bishop and a boy scout. There were but three parachutes on board. The pilot, grabbing one parachute, bailed out. The others would have to decide which of them would be saved.

Senator said, “There are only two parachutes left. Because I am necessary to the country, I should have a parachute. The two of you will have to decide who lives and who dies.” Immediately he grabbed one and jumped.

Bishop looked at the young Boy Scout and said, “Son, I have lived a long life. I think it fitting that you should have the remaining parachute. I am ready to die.”

That won't be necessary, Bishop, said the Boy Scout. There are two parachutes here. Senator just jumped out with my knapsack.”

Cleverness sometimes leaves no room for awareness.....

--Above is taken from Anthony De Mello  AWARENESS #232 (Edited)



NOW...ABOUT ME

Sometimes I've sat in an AA meeting trying to think of something entertaining to say, interesting, funny maybe—truly clever! In so doing, I became totally unaware what was being said, something I might have needed to hear. (Because I firmly believe God talks to me through the Peeps...if I LISTEN!)

And so this natural Ego-driven cleverness of mine (in all  blocks me from that spiritual sunlight of the 'unknowing'--which I must have to stay out of the darkness of knowledge. Yup, I read that over again, and it made sense to me—grin!

Image in Deviant Art
faun__s_spring_by_legko-d3ic46w.jpg



Friday, January 13, 2012

GOD AND MY MONKEY


WHAT GOD WILL--AND WON'T-- DO!

A disciple came riding on his camel to the tent of his Sufi Master. He dismounted and walked right into the tent, bowed low and said, “So great is my trust in God that I have left my camel outside, untied, convinced that God protects the interests of those who love Him.”

Go tie your camel, you fool!” said the Master. “God cannot be bothered doing for you what you are perfectly capable of doing for yourself.”

--De Mello, “Taking Flight” page 100...



And so...here I be—
in silence, effortless.
At long last to 'see'
some of these things.

Alone, in darkness,
atop tall tower
gazing at my past,
...to jump now or
cravenly cower?

Hundreds—no--
thousands times I
stopped the drinking,
drugging, mugging,
chaos and strife-

each time right back
to same old life:
devastating
one after other,
children, sisters, wife,
mother, father, brother.

After years fighting
and tears, fears,

God intervened
so it seemed.
Brought me
and my monkey
to Alcoholics Anonymous.

Now thirty-seven years
without one drop...
for me all done
what I could not:

Powerful, wondrous power!!!
To this I attest:
my disease, in arrest.
Present life...the best!

WRITTEN IN ATTITUDE OF GRATITUDE

My last drink March 18, 1974
Shirt size: Smaller. (Monkey
finally got off my back!)




Saturday, January 7, 2012

PERSPECTIVE: ANOTHER DIMENSION


MY PRESENT WAY OF 'SEEING' THE WORLD
 IS QUITE DEFECTIVE, MALADJUSTED. 
PLEASE READ ON:

Talk about 'Fourth Dimension'?--grin!
Believing this a statue, I sat down...
and it said, "How ya doin' Bud?"

PERSPECTIVE

Things as they really are
I do not see
I only notice
as *I* be...

A friend, age eighty-one
came to visit me...
all wet and muddy, he.
"That creek--one mile away:
 It used to be
I'd jump right across.
Today I leap...and land
in the middle.
When did it become so wide?”

(To what he believes a pond,
measures same, side to side...
was no magic wand--
but age of the 'sage'!)

Myself now--to be true—grin!
I'll often say to you,
Each time I bend over,
farther it is to the green
than when I was
(shhhh!) but a teen.”

--steveroni


NOTE! The idea for this post taken 
from DeMello "Awakening" #281

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

LIVE EXCITINGLY!

Posted for those 'nicest' Peeps
at dVerse Poetry Pub's
Open Link Night--week #25,
and their poet-Peeps, which
you can visit HERE!
Please do!!!




DO NOT AS I SAY...

Certainly my child, you may
follow the example, advice.
of those surrounding you
what they do and say
each day

With care
beware,
my friend
of every single step
you take
and food you make—unsalted.

Beware of all--young and old.
Observe askance the
brave and bold,
my Friend

Look at every he and she.
Watch and imitate...
infiltrate--assimilate,
dear Peep.

Neither borrower
nor lender be. 
remember--see?
 Be skeptical
like me--grin!
And be all I've told
--so very, very careful
of each little branch
lying in wait
across the
trail

you then can end
suffer same fate
like your parents.
Nothing very good or bad
will ever happen to you.

When you finally come to die
Life will have passed you by.

Even worse:
Life and you will have gone
in opposite direction

PEACE
--steveroni